November 27, 2000

 Busy, busy days lately!  Since last i wrote, i went to a gathering of other fem subs and had a fine gossip fest, traveled off to Burlington to teach a lovely older woman how to use the internet, we had company over the weekend (a friend of Master's), i shopped with Nikkidame, went to exercise class with P and E (vanilla female friends i met via Master) went to my dance class, spent time with T (Master's daughter), had lunch out several times and nice moments with Master.   The only problem was, those moments were never long enough, or alone enough to do any ... you know.  And He'd started getting vocal about it to whomever was listening.

      So by yesterday morning, with the door firmly shut behind the last of our company, i was accosted!  i don't think the poor fellow who'd been visiting had his feet off the front steps yet, before i was ... in fact i am positive i was quite naked while he was backing his car out of the driveway.  And i had one rather large happy male hovering over me, grinning from ear to ear.  How can a girl resist? *g*

      Not much longer before we have privacy again, however.  Said son has gone back from wence he came, to pack up his apartment and with the aid of his father, move into his new place on Friday.  i remember years ago my mother saying; "once they've moved out, it never works if they move back" and i think i understand what she meant now.  It's not that we love each other any less (even though we argue).  It's just that the generation gap rears its ugly head.  Sure, said son has been patient and polite about the fact that we eat at different times than he does, and different food, and then there's no tv and our music is nothing like his.  And he's very independent and doesn't want any advice from me ... i'm to treat him as an adult now, dontcha know!  (He listens to Master ... must be a guy thing.) Yet then there is the incredulous look on his face when i say; "no, i'm not making your lunch, i'm working and you are capable of doing it yourself."  Mom can cater - food and laundry - but knows nothing the rest of the time.

     i don't think so!

     But after a month, he's starting to pace ... getting anxious to indulge his twenty year old needs.  i can't say that i blame him.  These past weeks have reminded me of what i was like at the same age.  i was engaged to be married and only two short years later, gave birth to said son.  i'm happy to report he's not showing any signs of wishing to do same just yet.  

      And just for the record.  i'm still an easy sop.  He had to work midnights last night, and as i was off to bed, he asked if i'd make his sandwich.  i said no, the food was there for him to have and i was tired.  Did i get back out of bed a half hour later and do it?  *sigh*  Of course i did.  i can't let him starve at four in the morning can i?    

      This exercising stuff is starting to kill me.  Well okay it only feels that way, but still!  And each class says do a different thing.  

     Yoga - find your center, straighten your spine, put your shoulders back and down, pelvis pushed forward. No curves in the spine, tsk! tsk! Imagine that one hundred dollar bill clenched between your butt cheeks and that book on your head! (both of which i 'drop' regularly)  

     Then off to dance class.  Bend your knees, put some spring into that hop, push your buttocks out, pretend you are sitting on a small bench. Push that tush out!  A girl gets confused.

      And now a new gym.  Closer to home which means my chances of going more often are better.  It's a really great place actually, with lots of machines that go bump in the night.   Well crash actually, when i let go too quickly and the weights fly down and i get tsk'd at by the owners again.  

      And they have mirrors everywhere.  Honestly, i cannot imagine why they need them.  It seems such a masochistic thing to do - to be sitting on one of these machines watching yourself sweat and your cheeks puff out, neck tendons straining as you attempt to push the weights.  Or try to walk straight after using a treadmill for the first time. Who really needs to see this?  

     'Course on the flip side, one can pretend to be exercising while really checking out the eye candy.  Yummm!

      After the workout this morning, i walked with E to the Shopper's Drug Mart.  She needed to post some Christmas cards and i was enjoying the time out.  i decided to wander around the store while i waited.

      i found lots of small things that i know the kids would like for Christmas - earrings and perfume, hair colour and nail things - and a mental list of who i was buying for went through my mind.  Not many anymore, just P and T, and my kids.  It seems so weird.

     What made me pause however, was when i passed by the display of Chantilly perfumes.  They were my mother's favourites ... especially the talcum powder and the soap.  i'd been giving her care packages that included the liquid perfume (she didn't like sprays) for years and years.  Every Christmas and every birthday.  

      It's funny the memories we retain.  And even though i have  many resentments still to work through about her, it caught me off guard that i would remember this particular thing with a fond nostalgia.  It's very confusing sometimes.